Going through a divorce can be complicated. In addition to coming to terms with all the changes, you eventually need to inform your loved ones about your decision.
During your conversations, you should be ready for questions. These may include things like, “Are you okay? Are you prepared for it? What did they do?” and even, “Have you tried therapy?” or “Who will move out?” to mention but a few. Here is how to respond to these questions:
If you’re not ready to talk, you’re under no obligation
If a loved one asks about a subject you are not ready to talk about, you can decline to answer.
A response like, “I’m sorry, I’m not in a position to answer that, I just wanted to let you know about the divorce,” is polite but portrays your stance on not discussing the matter in depth.
Stick to broad topics and just the facts
If you are comfortable answering a question, you should stick to the major facts. You don’t need to go into details. For instance, if someone asks about moving out, and you and your spouse have already decided, you can answer this, as they will know about it sooner or later. But you don’t need to tell them how you arrived at the decision.
If someone persists, you can use a statement like, “I appreciate you asking, but that is all I can tell you,” or “Thank you for your concern, but I’d rather not discuss that now.”
Don’t take the questions too personally
Some of the questions your loved ones will ask may be offensive – because people often don’t quite seem to know where personal boundaries lie when they’re trying to show concern. If a conversation gets uncomfortable, you can excuse yourself.
If you have decided to go through a divorce, it will be best to get legal help to protect your interests.