When a couple is having marital trouble, they sometimes decide that something needs to change. There’s a fundamental issue breaking the relationship apart. They need something that will bring them closer together again so that they can repair that relationship.
In some cases, these couples will decide that they should have a child. Maybe the relationship just isn’t working as a couple, but it will work as a family. With a child to focus on and care for, they imagine that they will come together as a team, becoming more united and seeing their marital satisfaction increase. But will this actually happen?
The opposite is usually true
What researchers have found is that marital satisfaction actually tends to drop for the majority of couples after they have a child. They are less happy with the state of their relationship after the baby is born.
In one study, this was true for about 2/3 of couples, so researchers consider it to be normal. Couples who see this reduction in satisfaction should not worry that the child is going to ruin an otherwise happy marriage.
But on the other side of the issue, if the couple is already experiencing trouble and low levels of satisfaction, the child is just going to make things more difficult. Plus, if they still decide to get a divorce after they have had a child, it makes things much more complicated, as they have to spend the next 18 years cooperating as co-parents.
Getting divorced can be complex with or without children. Couples who are splitting up need to take the time to consider their legal options.